I celebrated today by listening to Handel's Messiah after spending 3 hours trying to clean the basement. I think the first layer of dirt is gone... then I had to clean myself and then my bathroom and my kitchen. But things are feeling better now. And all the laundry is done. If I had 4 more hours worth of energy, I'd clean the rest of the floors and rugs, too. I guess that's what next week is for.
Oh yeah, and for filing. Normally I do it on New Year's Day, but tomorrow is the Sabbath, so I will write letters, study the scriptures, write in my journal, and cook enough food for the next week instead.
I am grateful for the Christmas season we just had. It was a blessing to me, and my testimony of my Savior grew in abundance. I am glad to be a member of His Church, and for the blessings of the temple and personal revelation. They have made all the difference in my life this year.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Sabbath Musings
I have been contemplating many things recently, from how to get food to magically appear in my kitchen without any preparation or trips to the grocery store (unlikely), to how to get enough sleep and still do all the things that need doing (near impossible), to the remarkable change that takes place in my heart when I serve someone for years on end (astonishing), to the ways my testimony of Jesus Christ and His gospel has grown through the experiences of the past twelve months (profound).
I was thinking in Relief Society today as we talked about exaltation - what it is, how to obtain it, and why it is so important to focus on it - about a conversation I had with a colleague of mine a year or so ago. We had been discussing another employee. Who or why is irrelevant to the story (mostly because I don't remember). She contested that no matter what I invested in this person, it would do no good because "people can't change". I don't recall my direct answer to her then, but I knew as well then as I know now that she and I believe entirely differently on that point.
The foundational principle of the Gospel in which I believe is that people can change - and that they do, every day. King Benjamin's people were not just saying some trite, meaningless phrases when they responded to his teachings with the expression "we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more desire to do evil, but to do good continually." Truly, their hearts had been changed. Their tendency to act in ways that violated God's commandments had been replaced with a burning desire to do good. I'm not talking about murder and covetousness and adultery here, although the desire for those things died, too. This experience also changed the tendency for a man to get upset with his neighbor because he felt taken advantage of; his secret desire for the failure of his colleague who was implementing a bad idea; the self-pitying nobody-appreciates-me-itis that made hard workers disgruntled; and the judgmental conversations about others wherein ignorance met speculation.
If the Gospel is true (and it is), then when the Atonement of Jesus Christ is efficacious in our lives, it provides a way for us to change not just our behaviors, but our very natures. We learn to give even when others don't give equally back; we learn to support our leaders even when we disagree with their ideas, and then pray fervently for their success; we learn that gratitude for God's blessings overcomes all forms of -itis; we learn that withholding judgment is sometimes the best choice, for only One knows the desires of our hearts and can truly judge righteously.
God, our Father, who gives us all, is so anxious to bless us that He gave us blessings in anticipation of our obedience! He gave us life, breath, this world and all its beauty. Then, every time we obey, He pours out blessings upon our heads - more than I feel I merit, at times - and yet, He does so willingly, lovingly, and without expectation: further obedience does not settle the account, you see. He continues to bless us abundantly each time we obey. It is not about keeping score. If it were, I'd be losing. Every day.
Perhaps this is part of what it means to become like God - to learn to bless and give willingly, abundantly, and generously, regardless of response. To forgive those who (literally or figuratively) wound us, as Jesus forgave those who pierced His hands and feet and side. To love those who may never thank us for all we gave on their behalf. To give, and give, and then give some more, without demanding anything in return, because it is how we express our love and our confidence in the one to whom we give.
Such a description rings true of parenthood. Fatherhood. Motherhood. Godhood. Exaltation.
I have experienced this kind of fundamental change in my own life. I am by no means perfect, but my Father has, in His wonderful, loving, omnipotent way, taught me a little bit about how to love like this. He has filled my heart with feelings that must be akin to His: great yearnings for the happiness of His children; desires for them to know Him as I know Him, that they might see His hand in their lives as I see His hand in mine. These yearnings fill my soul some minutes, and leave me wondering how to share that which I know with those I love in such a way that it will penetrate into their hearts - the part that is prepared to receive His love.
I don't have all the answers, nor do I profess to, but I am confident that when I join forces with the most powerful being in the Universe, we'll figure it out together. And it is that confidence that tied together a lesson on exaltation, a lesson on the book of the Revelation of St. John, three beautiful talks on compassion, a thought on our everlasting sphere of influence, and the prayer of a loving bishop in tithing settlement into one great message: the message of Christmas, of Christ, of Love.
I was thinking in Relief Society today as we talked about exaltation - what it is, how to obtain it, and why it is so important to focus on it - about a conversation I had with a colleague of mine a year or so ago. We had been discussing another employee. Who or why is irrelevant to the story (mostly because I don't remember). She contested that no matter what I invested in this person, it would do no good because "people can't change". I don't recall my direct answer to her then, but I knew as well then as I know now that she and I believe entirely differently on that point.
The foundational principle of the Gospel in which I believe is that people can change - and that they do, every day. King Benjamin's people were not just saying some trite, meaningless phrases when they responded to his teachings with the expression "we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more desire to do evil, but to do good continually." Truly, their hearts had been changed. Their tendency to act in ways that violated God's commandments had been replaced with a burning desire to do good. I'm not talking about murder and covetousness and adultery here, although the desire for those things died, too. This experience also changed the tendency for a man to get upset with his neighbor because he felt taken advantage of; his secret desire for the failure of his colleague who was implementing a bad idea; the self-pitying nobody-appreciates-me-itis that made hard workers disgruntled; and the judgmental conversations about others wherein ignorance met speculation.
If the Gospel is true (and it is), then when the Atonement of Jesus Christ is efficacious in our lives, it provides a way for us to change not just our behaviors, but our very natures. We learn to give even when others don't give equally back; we learn to support our leaders even when we disagree with their ideas, and then pray fervently for their success; we learn that gratitude for God's blessings overcomes all forms of -itis; we learn that withholding judgment is sometimes the best choice, for only One knows the desires of our hearts and can truly judge righteously.
God, our Father, who gives us all, is so anxious to bless us that He gave us blessings in anticipation of our obedience! He gave us life, breath, this world and all its beauty. Then, every time we obey, He pours out blessings upon our heads - more than I feel I merit, at times - and yet, He does so willingly, lovingly, and without expectation: further obedience does not settle the account, you see. He continues to bless us abundantly each time we obey. It is not about keeping score. If it were, I'd be losing. Every day.
Perhaps this is part of what it means to become like God - to learn to bless and give willingly, abundantly, and generously, regardless of response. To forgive those who (literally or figuratively) wound us, as Jesus forgave those who pierced His hands and feet and side. To love those who may never thank us for all we gave on their behalf. To give, and give, and then give some more, without demanding anything in return, because it is how we express our love and our confidence in the one to whom we give.
Such a description rings true of parenthood. Fatherhood. Motherhood. Godhood. Exaltation.
I have experienced this kind of fundamental change in my own life. I am by no means perfect, but my Father has, in His wonderful, loving, omnipotent way, taught me a little bit about how to love like this. He has filled my heart with feelings that must be akin to His: great yearnings for the happiness of His children; desires for them to know Him as I know Him, that they might see His hand in their lives as I see His hand in mine. These yearnings fill my soul some minutes, and leave me wondering how to share that which I know with those I love in such a way that it will penetrate into their hearts - the part that is prepared to receive His love.
I don't have all the answers, nor do I profess to, but I am confident that when I join forces with the most powerful being in the Universe, we'll figure it out together. And it is that confidence that tied together a lesson on exaltation, a lesson on the book of the Revelation of St. John, three beautiful talks on compassion, a thought on our everlasting sphere of influence, and the prayer of a loving bishop in tithing settlement into one great message: the message of Christmas, of Christ, of Love.
Monday, December 12, 2011
On Reality
Some days, you just have to laugh.
Goal: be super productive and get lots done after a wonderful three day weekend.
Reality: 10 am - orient self to recently rebuilt computer and catch up on email. 11 am - meeting one (recurring, planned, fine). 11:45 am - meeting two (spontaneous but necessary). 12:15 pm - meeting three (also spontaneous but necessary). 12:45 pm - call IT so recently rebuilt computer will run the way I'm used to. 1:10 pm - kick IT out and start meeting four (ten minutes late). 1:30 pm - relocate meeting four to colleague's office who also has the computer program I need for the meeting (and involve said colleague). 2:00 pm - meeting five (planned, but 30 min late). 2:30 pm - grab food, tell IT about computer problem, and head to meeting six (unplanned but essential). 3:30 pm - grab more food and head into meeting seven (an hour later than planned). 6 pm - start the day's work by doing a bunch of unimportant stuff that will clear my desk and my head. 7:10 pm - look at the clock, startled - it's already time to go to FHE!
The best part about tomorrow is that I can try again. :-)
Goal: be super productive and get lots done after a wonderful three day weekend.
Reality: 10 am - orient self to recently rebuilt computer and catch up on email. 11 am - meeting one (recurring, planned, fine). 11:45 am - meeting two (spontaneous but necessary). 12:15 pm - meeting three (also spontaneous but necessary). 12:45 pm - call IT so recently rebuilt computer will run the way I'm used to. 1:10 pm - kick IT out and start meeting four (ten minutes late). 1:30 pm - relocate meeting four to colleague's office who also has the computer program I need for the meeting (and involve said colleague). 2:00 pm - meeting five (planned, but 30 min late). 2:30 pm - grab food, tell IT about computer problem, and head to meeting six (unplanned but essential). 3:30 pm - grab more food and head into meeting seven (an hour later than planned). 6 pm - start the day's work by doing a bunch of unimportant stuff that will clear my desk and my head. 7:10 pm - look at the clock, startled - it's already time to go to FHE!
The best part about tomorrow is that I can try again. :-)
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Miracles
I believe in miracles.
Two friends I dearly love are getting married. To each other.
A loving Father inspires me to know how to help another who is sad.
And He made our voices glorious in singing praises to His Holy Son tonight during our Christmas concert. I am so glad to believe in a God who loves us so much He can magnify our talents, tune our pitches, and help us feel of His great love! What a joyous time of year!
Come to tomorrow's performance! I would love to see you there.
Two friends I dearly love are getting married. To each other.
A loving Father inspires me to know how to help another who is sad.
And He made our voices glorious in singing praises to His Holy Son tonight during our Christmas concert. I am so glad to believe in a God who loves us so much He can magnify our talents, tune our pitches, and help us feel of His great love! What a joyous time of year!
Come to tomorrow's performance! I would love to see you there.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
On Being Happy
Last week, we had ward temple night. While there, I realized how happy I feel when I am regularly in the temple. More importantly, I realized how much happy I had missed out on over the week or two prior because I hadn't been in the temple. Saturday and today reinforced the message.
So it's official. Being in the temple = being happy.
And the part that made me smile tonight? I was asked by an acquaintance if I brought my husband with me when I came to the temple. I told him no, because I'm still looking for him - but if he can figure out if he's here, to let me know. That made him smile, and I thought to myself, this is probably the best place to find him anyway. So I will keep going back. Just in case he's there one of these times. :-)
But if not, I will still be happy.
That is all.
So it's official. Being in the temple = being happy.
And the part that made me smile tonight? I was asked by an acquaintance if I brought my husband with me when I came to the temple. I told him no, because I'm still looking for him - but if he can figure out if he's here, to let me know. That made him smile, and I thought to myself, this is probably the best place to find him anyway. So I will keep going back. Just in case he's there one of these times. :-)
But if not, I will still be happy.
That is all.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
And When You're Feeling Creative...
What does your gingerbread house look like?
Last year I made a little nativity in my gingerbread yard. Don't remember? Check out last December's posts. (I'm too lazy to link it.)
This year, I made the suggestion that my good friend the gingerbread-house-making-princess make me a stable instead of a house. It turns out I like making Tootsie Roll people better than decorating the walls of a house.
Here is how it turned out:
Details of note: Joseph has a beard. I made hay out of Nerds. (Coconut would have worked better, but I had already committed to the Nerds when I figured that out. Next year.) My camel is nothing short of awesome (I think my sheep are pretty awesome again, too). Blue frosting made good water in the well. The Star(burst) on the top of the stable and the straight and narrow path lead a man right to Christ.
May the joy of the season be with you now and always.
Love.
Post Edit: the cloaks are made of flattened Dots, I think; if not that, then it was flattened gumdrops. I can't remember... Any other questions? :-)
Last year I made a little nativity in my gingerbread yard. Don't remember? Check out last December's posts. (I'm too lazy to link it.)
This year, I made the suggestion that my good friend the gingerbread-house-making-princess make me a stable instead of a house. It turns out I like making Tootsie Roll people better than decorating the walls of a house.
Here is how it turned out:
Details of note: Joseph has a beard. I made hay out of Nerds. (Coconut would have worked better, but I had already committed to the Nerds when I figured that out. Next year.) My camel is nothing short of awesome (I think my sheep are pretty awesome again, too). Blue frosting made good water in the well. The Star(burst) on the top of the stable and the straight and narrow path lead a man right to Christ.
I find great joy in creating things that remind me of Christmas. Even if it's with candy.
May the joy of the season be with you now and always.
Love.
Post Edit: the cloaks are made of flattened Dots, I think; if not that, then it was flattened gumdrops. I can't remember... Any other questions? :-)
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